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David Seddon: August 2012

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Helping You to Live a Better Life. Saturday, 18 August 2012. Intimacy and Armour in Relationships. 8220;When we were children, we used to think that when we were grown-up we would no longer be vulnerable. But. To grow up is to accept vulnerability. To be alive is to be vulnerable.”. 8220;The opposite of loneliness, it's not togetherness. It is intimacy.” Richard Bach. I see a lot of people (individuals and couples) who lack any real intimacy in their lives. It is a cause of great regret to them. There is...

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David Seddon: April 2013

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Helping You to Live a Better Life. Monday, 15 April 2013. The Importance of Good Listening. It is often said that many counselling clients claim that the most important and useful thing that they take from counselling is that they feel listened to and understood. Home is where you can say anything you like cause nobody listens to you anyway. “. People have commented how good listening is a valuable though sadly rare aspect of life, throughout the centuries. The ancient Greek philosopher. Poor listening c...

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David Seddon: July 2013

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Helping You to Live a Better Life. Wednesday, 24 July 2013. When to Use the F Word with Your Partner. The famous (or infamous) Anglo-Saxon swear word is often thought of as one of the most powerful words that anyone can use, but it has a tiny fraction of the force of another word beginning with f. This other word is one of the true heavyweights of the English language. If you haven’t already guessed, that word is forgiveness. Alexander Pope described it like this:. Sometimes the hurt party has every huma...

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David Seddon: June 2012

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Helping You to Live a Better Life. Friday, 1 June 2012. Men and Counselling - Part 2 (Why Some Men are Reluctant to Seek Therapy and Why they Should Anyway). This is part 2 of my Blog Article about men and counselling. For part one, please look here: http:/ davidseddon.blogspot.co.uk/2012/05/men-and-counselling-part-one.html. Some men think of counselling as a ‘female’ activity. Ome men may feel that going to counselling means that they will lose some sort of control over their lives. In fact the opp...

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David Seddon: March 2012

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Helping You to Live a Better Life. Tuesday, 27 March 2012. On the Joys of Slowing Down (and on Philosophy, Nature and Poetry). Another person whom I greatly admire was the poet Robert Frost. He said, “by working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day. “ Again, Frost was no shirker, labouring long and hard on each of his poems till he got them just right - but he understood the value of noticing, of watching things. I’d Soonest Sit and Seldom Run. To rol...

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David Seddon: June 2013

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Helping You to Live a Better Life. Sunday, 23 June 2013. When the Police sang Message in a Bottle they were expressing something universal about people:. 8220;More loneliness than any man could bear. Rescue me before I fall into despair. I’ll send an SOS to the world. I hope that someone gets my message in a bottle”. It seems that loneliness is all too prevalent in the modern world. In modern Britain, according to the 2011 census, 30% of people live alone – this is much higher than most countries. Loneli...

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David Seddon: October 2012

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Helping You to Live a Better Life. Sunday, 28 October 2012. Working with Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) – How to Stop the Clocks Going Back from Controlling your Mood. Studies in the UK show that up to 25% of people are affected by Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), with about a quarter of that group suffering it badly. The problem is worst in the Autumn and Winter months, especially after the clocks go back. 2012 has been a very rainy and overcast year so the problem will probably be worse than normal.

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David Seddon: May 2012

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Helping You to Live a Better Life. Wednesday, 23 May 2012. Men and Counselling - Part One - Introduction. Even though times have changed a lot and we live in a much less male-dominated society, cultural and societal conditioning still sends out strong messages about how men should be: “be a real man,” “be one of the lads,” “big boys don’t cry,” “don’t be a whimp! 8221; “are you a man or a mouse? 8221; “what a wuss! 8221; “are you man enough? The good news is that for the great majority of time this is no...

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David Seddon: November 2011

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Helping You to Live a Better Life. Friday, 25 November 2011. How to Deal Better with Angry or Hurtful People. Deep anxiety is often much worse than fear because one feels oneself under continuous threat or perhaps one feels a threat to one’s essential view of the self, whereas fear, however bad, is normally about a situation that will pass soon. I want to outline a few pointers for dealing with angry or hurtful people:. The Dalai Lama said that before speaking one must ask if something is true, kind and ...

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David Seddon: September 2012

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Helping You to Live a Better Life. Thursday, 20 September 2012. Anxiety and How to Cope With It. Anxiety seems to be everywhere in the West and indeed, in the Handbook of Social Psychology, RR Willoughby described Anxiety as “the most prominent mental characteristic of Occidental Society.”. I think that’s true. It’s important first to differentiate between fear and anxiety. Most of us mix the two up – and they can overlap – one can feel both fear and anxiety for something. Anxiety sticks around longer, b...