stantose.wordpress.com
Common Sense | stantose
https://stantose.wordpress.com/2014/09/11/common-sense
September 11, 2014. At the time that this little girl sent her stick hurtling through the air at my son’s face, I am sure it seemed to her like a reasonable thing to do. She was just playing, after all. She was using her super power! Many would tout the creativeness of it–her right to enjoy nature, and to learn from her mistakes. In fact, I was in the company of quite a few who do tow that line. I would ask, though, if their position might differ if it were. Not a great idea. Leave a Reply Cancel reply.
stantose.wordpress.com
A New Home | stantose
https://stantose.wordpress.com/2015/01/21/a-new-home
January 21, 2015. This is the place we called home when we welcomed our children into the world. I cradled my eldest, wrapped in her yellow swaddling blanket, and showed her her new room. I showed her our room, the kitchen, the dining room, the living room. This is the place of life, birth, love, beauty and fatigue and truth. This is where our family was born. In our final months here, I walk through in a daze. Because you see,. This is where we sat in our rocking chair and rocked our babies to sleep, si...
stantose.wordpress.com
stantose | Keeping it Zen | Page 2
https://stantose.wordpress.com/page/2
April 7, 2016. She liked me. I cared for her very much. All these relationships just cut short. I cannot understand that. A bomb dropped so that they all blew up, desperately careful though I was to protect little hearts, and my own. The end of this is the beginning of something else. I don’t know what that is. But one thing is for sure. I’m in it. Both the end, and the beginning. March 24, 2016. Am I sabotaging a relationship with someone I am deeply in love with, or is he stringing me along? In my marr...
stantose.wordpress.com
seales1010 | stantose
https://stantose.wordpress.com/author/seales1010
October 3, 2016. When I think about the past 12 months I immediately feel a dragging, nagging sense of loss. I feel anger and helplessness, and for teensy seconds here and there, I feel like a victim. I *know* my children were victims. I know that no one asked any of us what we thought or how we felt about…any of this. There has been a loss of innocence. A loss of security and predictability. A loss of a single family in a single home. Can there be loss without gain? Or gain without loss? I am feeling th...
stantose.wordpress.com
A House, A Home | stantose
https://stantose.wordpress.com/2015/07/20/a-house-a-home
July 20, 2015. A House, A Home. So it follows, naturally, that all the same old parenting obstacles have followed me here: to this sunny, warm, and absolutely gorgeous (dare I say heaven sent) day. Days like this have been few and far between. 8221; they demand. “HOLD ME! 8221; And I do. And most of the time I enjoy it, or tolerate it fairly well anyhow. But what if I feel like I am not fit to lead? What if I don’t know what I’m doing? It doesn’t seem to matter because here I am. Clueless about...These d...
stantose.wordpress.com
Tread Lightly | stantose
https://stantose.wordpress.com/2015/07/26/tread-lightly
July 26, 2015. We met at the park. She invited me to the zoo. So I went. We chatted about all things motherly. Our children aren’t the same ages. We are not similar. But we had fun. And in chatting about those universal motherhood truths, she said, with shame in her eyes, “well, I failed at breastfeeding.”. I remember that feeling of failure. Breastfeeding is not and should never be a defining criterion for a loving and good mother. The sacrifice or pain–or even suffering–we endure is not...Let’s t...
stantose.wordpress.com
Kindness. Even for Mommy. | stantose
https://stantose.wordpress.com/2015/02/14/kindness-even-for-mommy
February 14, 2015. Kindness. Even for Mommy. That’s right. None of my 3 children have ever said anything like that to me. Not once. They have screamed, they have thrown tantrums, they have raged, but never have they said such hateful things: not to me, and not to each other. And if they did say something like that, it wouldn’t go over well with me. They know it. Have felt like they are doing something wrong because they wouldn’t tolerate that kind of talk? 8221; or “THAT’S COMPLETELY UNFAIR! When we as p...
stantose.wordpress.com
Roller Rink | stantose
https://stantose.wordpress.com/2014/10/21/roller-rink
October 21, 2014. Simply put, her determination floored me. Where I would have sat down, she got up. Where I would have given up, she fought. And in the last lap she said to me, “MOM! I only fell ONCE! I’m getting so much better! 8221; Oh, the grin. On the way home she said, “OW! But when I fell I said, ‘well, my butt hurts, but I’m not gonna let that stop me from learning how to roller-skate! Was it because I was there, I wondered? Had I left, would she have still tried to master skating? Fill in your d...
stantose.wordpress.com
The Lawn | stantose
https://stantose.wordpress.com/2015/05/01/the-lawn
May 1, 2015. I’d be here, in this cold dark empty house. So, I drive. I can’t begin to imagine. And somewhere in my heart I know that this qualifies as a zen activity. He does it to do it. Because in his mind it needs to be done. Like monks who smooth stones in the garden with a rake, he clips the stray grass. It’s no different. What if this gentleman did not clip his grass by hand? Would it still need to be done? So, it brings me back to my reality. What needs to be done? It isn’t my right to ques...
SOCIAL ENGAGEMENT