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I Am A Very Fucking Helpful Person | Cupcake Heartbreak
https://cupcakeheartbreak.com/2015/01/18/i-am-a-very-fucking-helpful-person
Black Helmet II: The Dark Knight Takes a Nap. Sparkly Batmans →. January 18, 2015 · 7:05 pm. I Am A Very Fucking Helpful Person. I pulled down my hood and watched her stomp her way forward up the other side of the street, ramming into bushes and trash cans, lurching ahead like her driving force was in her head and her hips and legs were just dragging along behind. 8220;Do you need help? 8220;OH MY GOD thank you! I just…at the party…sorry! 8221; She slammed into a tree. Drunk Ass: I KNOW WHERE I LIVE.
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depression | Cupcake Heartbreak
https://cupcakeheartbreak.com/tag/depression
June 20, 2016 · 2:30 pm. You and Whose Army. The Musical Comedy Murders of 1940. I complained about it a whole lot, surely. It hurt! Also you could totally see it under my dark black tights I had to wear for the entirety of the play. It was unmistakable: a big raised black/blue area, which eventually turned to purple, then faded to green, then yellow, and finally went away. The thing is, it’s. Oh, hello, Imperfection! HELLO MY NAME IS SKITTLES. When the flat, uh, flattened my leg, I felt the same panic I...
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Lean Cuisine Rejects | Cupcake Heartbreak
https://cupcakeheartbreak.com/2014/10/30/lean-cuisine-rejects
I don’t know who Subash is. HELLO, SHOE LOVER →. October 30, 2014 · 11:16 am. Deep in the Stouffer’s vault sits a freezer full of bad ideas. A selection of the finest cuts of lettuce. Defrost on High for 4 minutes, poke a hole in the plastic, defrost on High for another 2 minutes. Allow hot lettuce to cool for 2 minutes. Enough brown-flavored broth to cover the bottom of a shallow dinner plate. Heat, covered, for 12 seconds, pour onto dinner plate. Pretend it is pizza. Asian Carp with Whipped Potatoes.
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Holiday Film Review | Cupcake Heartbreak
https://cupcakeheartbreak.com/2015/01/02/holiday-film-review
HELLO, SHOE LOVER. Black Helmet II: The Dark Knight Takes a Nap →. January 2, 2015 · 6:23 pm. OK so I’ve finally jabbed a two by four under my butt and pried myself off the couch. I even washed my hair today! What Netflix says happens in this movie: “A couple has trouble convincing friends and neighbors that an alien is entering their house each night to terrorize their children.”. I want you to tell me right now why you are so ugly! Awww yeah, daddy like Lycra, Mrs. Jacobs. Go get a guard dog.”...
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Uncategorized | Cupcake Heartbreak
https://cupcakeheartbreak.com/category/uncategorized
August 3, 2016 · 11:44 am. I’m Not Even A Little Bit Scared Of You, Science Doctor Harrison Ford. What Lies Beneath: A Synopsis. What were you doing in the year 2000? Specifically, what were you doing on the weekend of July 21-23, 2000? Starring Harrison Ford and Michelle Pfeiffer! And you probably weren’t scared the whole time, either! Not even during the scary parts! It is a stupid movie, full of stupid people with stupid feelings. OMG I am so sick of staring at water. Calm down, Begonia! Scared Michel...
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movies | Cupcake Heartbreak
https://cupcakeheartbreak.com/tag/movies
January 13, 2015 · 5:25 pm. Black Helmet II: The Dark Knight Takes a Nap. Glad we got that out of the way. What’s up with you? Holiday Film Review, Part 2*. The Taking of Deborah Logan. What Netflix says happens in this movie: “For her Ph.D. thesis, Mia decides to film a woman’s Alzheimer’s battle, but when symptoms turn strange, the family suspects something more sinister.”. It’s not just for taking at parties, y’all. Thus begins the greatest medical documentary of all time! WHAT IS A CHICO’S? But he va...
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tv | Cupcake Heartbreak
https://cupcakeheartbreak.com/tag/tv
March 16, 2016 · 1:03 pm. God and a Good Time. It’s listening…. The new Apple TV has a new feature that I’m sure lots of normal people would be interested in using but it only makes me more anxious. Or maybe I’m the normal person and all the rest of these freaks are the weird ones for talking to their televisions? Oh fine are you happy now? Now nobody can watch HBO GO! SPEAK TO MEEEEEE I AM LEARNING. Things I want to ask the Apple TV:. I like movies. Do you like movies? OPPORTUNITY: Don’t wait for ...
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the crazies | Cupcake Heartbreak
https://cupcakeheartbreak.com/tag/the-crazies
Tag Archives: the crazies. November 4, 2014 · 12:07 pm. HELLO, SHOE LOVER. 8221; They smack their lips and slap a little cup of greasy, crusty mac and cheese onto your styrofoam platter. “Great choice! I get that this is positive reinforcement, it’s meant to signify that even these workers, these people who WORK here, are totally down with the food. They eat it all the time! GREAT JOB ON THAT ORDER, CHAMP! 8221; when it’s your turn. Then when you walk up there they go “HELLO SHOE LOVER! 8220;Oh, so you a...
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dieting | Cupcake Heartbreak
https://cupcakeheartbreak.com/tag/dieting
October 30, 2014 · 11:16 am. Deep in the Stouffer’s vault sits a freezer full of bad ideas. A selection of the finest cuts of lettuce. Defrost on High for 4 minutes, poke a hole in the plastic, defrost on High for another 2 minutes. Allow hot lettuce to cool for 2 minutes. Enough brown-flavored broth to cover the bottom of a shallow dinner plate. Heat, covered, for 12 seconds, pour onto dinner plate. Pretend it is pizza. Asian Carp with Whipped Potatoes. Leftover pizza and a side of chicken curry smother...
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HELLO, SHOE LOVER | Cupcake Heartbreak
https://cupcakeheartbreak.com/2014/11/04/hello-shoe-lover
Holiday Film Review →. November 4, 2014 · 12:07 pm. HELLO, SHOE LOVER. 8221; They smack their lips and slap a little cup of greasy, crusty mac and cheese onto your styrofoam platter. “Great choice! I get that this is positive reinforcement, it’s meant to signify that even these workers, these people who WORK here, are totally down with the food. They eat it all the time! GREAT JOB ON THAT ORDER, CHAMP! 8221; when it’s your turn. Then when you walk up there they go “HELLO SHOE LOVER! 8220;Oh, so you alrea...