marklebald.blogspot.com
Fortune Favors the Bald: June 2009
http://marklebald.blogspot.com/2009_06_01_archive.html
Thursday, June 11, 2009. Mister Blogs Slightly More Than a Disinterred Corpse. So it's been a while since my last post, and I'm currently cooking up a more substantial writing, yadda yadda. Well in the mean time, I thought I'd share recent frustrations in the style of Budweiser's timeless marketing campaign,. Real Men of Genius. Here’s to you, mister doesn’t know how to eat chocolate and simultaneously maintain his dignity. AMMMHMMAHMM… Ohmagaw… yu dunno how good thi ith…. When Harry Met Sally. Nothing e...
marklebald.blogspot.com
Fortune Favors the Bald: FFTB Gets a Facelift
http://marklebald.blogspot.com/2010/08/fftb-gets-facelift.html
Wednesday, August 4, 2010. FFTB Gets a Facelift. Thanks to a super sibling. Tyra did. That's who. Maybe it's the hermit in me rising to the surface. I am both amused and repulsed by people who lose themselves in the net (Sandra Bullock, anyone? For every self-absorbed autobiographical blogger, I'll show you a World of Warcraft devotee. You're a level 14 Mage, leader of your guild; you raided all the dungeons of the Eastern and Western kingdoms, and you're still. Labels: Americas Next Top Bald-el. Simple ...
marklebald.blogspot.com
Fortune Favors the Bald: August 2010
http://marklebald.blogspot.com/2010_08_01_archive.html
Wednesday, August 4, 2010. The Art Of Destroying a Craigslist Heckler. 1 If you are trying to get rid of things that are remotely likeable, it's best to post one item every 24 hours. Why? From Fortune Favors the Bald. To be honest, getting heckled took me aback. Could a complete stranger be any ruder? A missive penned with the most scathing verbal vitriol that you can imagine. What warrants the receipt of a nastogram? Bullshit you can get it for 15 new on amazon you ass clown. 40-fuckin-dollars and 99 ce...
marklebald.blogspot.com
Fortune Favors the Bald: December 2010
http://marklebald.blogspot.com/2010_12_01_archive.html
Friday, December 17, 2010. The Year of Roddick. Somewhere around mid-November every year, I have the same perennial reflection:. Holy freakin Lord, where did the time go? Is it really almost 20XX? Have I even done anything of note this year? What the hell am I doing with my life? Oh god, someone please make the Medicare PSAs STOP. As a side note, have you actually heard the vacuum pump ads? Or pumps to give perky peckers to the aging, non-procreating populace? Pumps it is. Grandpa needs boners. His antic...
marklebald.blogspot.com
Fortune Favors the Bald: The Year of Roddick
http://marklebald.blogspot.com/2010/12/year-of-roddick.html
Friday, December 17, 2010. The Year of Roddick. Somewhere around mid-November every year, I have the same perennial reflection:. Holy freakin Lord, where did the time go? Is it really almost 20XX? Have I even done anything of note this year? What the hell am I doing with my life? Oh god, someone please make the Medicare PSAs STOP. As a side note, have you actually heard the vacuum pump ads? Or pumps to give perky peckers to the aging, non-procreating populace? Pumps it is. Grandpa needs boners. His antic...
marklebald.blogspot.com
Fortune Favors the Bald: Spider Sanctuary
http://marklebald.blogspot.com/2010/07/spider-sanctuary.html
Sunday, July 25, 2010. For those of you so inclined). All that to say, I know what it's like to lose your voice, especially when life is the pressure cooker that somehow still hasn't turned your coal into diamonds. Accordingly, I've stocked up on Home Defense and all other anti-critter Ortho products, as well as recruited the professional arachnid assassins. Overkill? Its nice to read something from you :). July 25, 2010 at 8:27 PM. Those better be gone when I get there. July 27, 2010 at 3:24 PM.
marklebald.blogspot.com
Fortune Favors the Bald: The Art Of Destroying a Craigslist Heckler
http://marklebald.blogspot.com/2010/08/in-which-i-destroy-craigslist-heckler.html
Wednesday, August 4, 2010. The Art Of Destroying a Craigslist Heckler. 1 If you are trying to get rid of things that are remotely likeable, it's best to post one item every 24 hours. Why? From Fortune Favors the Bald. To be honest, getting heckled took me aback. Could a complete stranger be any ruder? A missive penned with the most scathing verbal vitriol that you can imagine. What warrants the receipt of a nastogram? Bullshit you can get it for 15 new on amazon you ass clown. 40-fuckin-dollars and 99 ce...
marklebald.blogspot.com
Fortune Favors the Bald: August 2008
http://marklebald.blogspot.com/2008_08_01_archive.html
Tuesday, August 5, 2008. Nothing can make me laugh harder (and simultaneously cringe) than a well thought out truth.com commercial. Their metropolitan antics coupled with raucous recitation of dubious statistics always incite sadistic glee on my part. But I’m reminded that I probably enjoy not so much the truth of truth.com as I do their megaphone style presentation of such startling facts as:. Did you know that pregnant mothers who smoke cause complications for their babies in the womb? Was a gasoline a...
marklebald.blogspot.com
Fortune Favors the Bald: July 2011
http://marklebald.blogspot.com/2011_07_01_archive.html
Thursday, July 14, 2011. Yes, I Kiss My Mother With This Mouth. Insert obligatory apology for fair-weather, semi-annual blogging* * Enough housekeeping, let's get to it kids. So many things going through my brain these days. It seems unfair to just let it all out there, but I've been accused of bloggerrhea before. Why buck the trend? Confirm my likely retirement as a bridge troll. So indisputably funny is proof that I could never be a volunteer for Big Brothers Big Sisters. Definite punch in the face....
marklebald.blogspot.com
Fortune Favors the Bald: April 2009
http://marklebald.blogspot.com/2009_04_01_archive.html
Sunday, April 26, 2009. Puke, I Am Your Father. Prior to the past two weeks, it had actually been some time since I'd (pardon the vernacular) blown chucks. But having to endure the recent inhospitality of a stomach virus, I find that memory did not serve me well. There are certain do's and don'ts with the art of throwing up. How does one throw up well? Here are a couple of reminders to help make the most of such an ignominious event. 1 Pause to pray. 2 Pinch the nose. Puking. What's really not fun? Keepi...