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outofthemouthofdave.com

Out of the mouth of Dave

Ramblings, rants and sometimes incoherent mumblings from an otherwise "sane"(?) inhabitant of planet earth.

http://www.outofthemouthofdave.com/

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Out of the mouth of Dave | outofthemouthofdave.com Reviews
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Ramblings, rants and sometimes incoherent mumblings from an otherwise sane(?) inhabitant of planet earth.
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1 humor blog
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3 out of the mouth of dave
4 observational humor blog
5 social commentary
6 Dave Crane
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isis and pornography,isis approved pornography,0 comments,cooking with isis,labels cooking,cucumber salad,isis,islamic state,called sharon,labels crack cocaine,*******,************,red light district,older posts,about dave,october,the humorsmith chronicle
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Out of the mouth of Dave | outofthemouthofdave.com Reviews

https://outofthemouthofdave.com

Ramblings, rants and sometimes incoherent mumblings from an otherwise "sane"(?) inhabitant of planet earth.

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1

Out of the mouth of Dave: Beaten to death with a blunt instrument

http://www.outofthemouthofdave.com/2008/07/beaten-to-death-with-blunt-instrument.html

July 23, 2008. Beaten to death with a blunt instrument. Beaten to death with a blunt instrument. That is how the papers say he met his untimely demise. Thankfully that is a phrase that we likely have not heard uttered, but what do you reckon was the instrument of death? If I was to beat someone to death with a blunt instrument I'd probably use a French horn or Tuba. Figure it's light enough but I'm wondering if it could stand up to the pounding on some unfortunate person's cranium? Oh ok . Thank you".

2

Out of the mouth of Dave: June 2013

http://www.outofthemouthofdave.com/2013_06_01_archive.html

June 22, 2013. There's an Aryan in my kitchen. Paula Deen and her latest admittance to using racial slurs has now reached a higher level of intrigue. Paula Deen for those of you who are not aware, is not. Racism has become an key part of her success in the kitchen. Our crack team of researchers (Me and Google) have uncovered a list of products that the white supremacy supporting Mrs Dean will not use in any of her recipes. Uncle Ben's Brown Rice - Umm Brown Rice? It's also safe to assume that based on th...

3

Out of the mouth of Dave: December 2011

http://www.outofthemouthofdave.com/2011_12_01_archive.html

December 23, 2011. Christmas Trees and the PC Police. Psst hey buddy - wanna buy a Christmas Tree? A shadowy figure beckoned to me from the alleyway. Usually having any interaction with men in alleyways was never a recommended practice - let alone on a dark December night. I know you want it" the figure spoke again, and he slowly pulled back his trench coat to reveal the branches of a Christmas Tree. The PC Police would prefer that there were no Christmas displays at all, but if you did feel the need to ...

4

Out of the mouth of Dave: September 2013

http://www.outofthemouthofdave.com/2013_09_01_archive.html

September 21, 2013. A hooker, A bag of chips and $5. I was sitting parked in my car in a seedier part of town, the sun was going down and societies undesirables were emerging from their crack dens to prowl the streets. Say what you like about society's undesirables but they certainly have an entrepreneurial streak. Sitting in my car I was offered some crack,meth, molly and a "date" with a toothless lady (? I politely declined any and all offers -. I could hear her laughing as I hung up the phone. This wa...

5

Out of the mouth of Dave: The Perfect Murder Weapon

http://www.outofthemouthofdave.com/2009/11/perfect-murder-weapon.html

November 20, 2009. The Perfect Murder Weapon. I have figured out how to commit the perfect murder. Yeah you read that right, the perfect murder and there is no way those fancy CSI folks could catch you. I tell you if OJ had done this years ago he would be out there right now playing golf instead of um err.oh never mind. I did not start out looking for ways to commit the perfect murder - the idea just came to me. Let me set the scene for you. Landing inches away from my feet. My heart was pounding, adrena...

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Awards | Slings And Arrows

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For Willie and Frankie – Part 2. July 10, 2010. Leave a Reply Cancel reply. Enter your comment here. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:. Address never made public). You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. ( Log Out. You are commenting using your Twitter account. ( Log Out. You are commenting using your Facebook account. ( Log Out. You are commenting using your Google account. ( Log Out. Notify me of new comments via email. Pic Of The Week. Quote Of The Week. The Pen Is Mi...

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Slings And Arrows | Hey we don't make this stuff up. Uh, well, wait a minute – actually we do! | Page 2

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Newer posts →. October 28, 2010 · 6:51 am. Slings And Arrows Celebrates Year Of Satire. A year ago Slings And Arrows. Stuck its head up out of the internet humour blog trough and started to parody and satirize politics – primarily Canadian politics, although we’ve been known to take a swipe at the goings-on in the US of A and once or twice we’ve poked our lance all the way to France. THE DOLLAR TAKES A DUMP. Sound of toilet flushing). Kevin: Well, Heather, I must say you’ve caught me at an awkward ...

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Remember | Slings And Arrows

https://nonamedufus.wordpress.com/2010/11/11/remember

Headlines And Song Titles. The Pen Is Mightier Than The Sword →. November 11, 2010 · 6:47 am. 11th hour, 11th day, 11th month. Filed under Remembrance Day. Headlines And Song Titles. The Pen Is Mightier Than The Sword →. Leave a Reply Cancel reply. Enter your comment here. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:. Address never made public). You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. ( Log Out. You are commenting using your Twitter account. ( Log Out. Pic Of The Week. Likes Everyt...

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The Pen Is Mightier Than The Sword | Slings And Arrows

https://nonamedufus.wordpress.com/2010/11/06/the-pen-is-mightier-than-the-sword-36

Willie And Frankie #7. Headlines And Song Titles →. November 6, 2010 · 7:11 am. The Pen Is Mightier Than The Sword. Filed under editorial cartoons. Tagged as ha ha. Willie And Frankie #7. Headlines And Song Titles →. Leave a Reply Cancel reply. Enter your comment here. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:. Address never made public). You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. ( Log Out. You are commenting using your Twitter account. ( Log Out. Pic Of The Week. Quote Of The Week.

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The Humor Books Blog: The Healing Power of Spam

http://thehumorbooksblog.blogspot.com/2010/06/healing-power-of-spam.html

The Humor Books Blog. Welcome to The Humor Books Blog, a space dedicated to commentary by humorist and author Liam James Leaven, occasional recommendations and introductions to humor writers, and other assorted stories and such, most of which will begin with an intro akin to, "This one time, at band camp . . .". Godspeed, Faithful Reader. On The Origins Of On The Origins Of Joy Boy's Chasm. Huge Words by Huge People. The Healing Power of Spam. Hey Liam, did you get that Crabpull Project done yet? I need ...

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SCUZZYMONEY: June 2010

http://scuzzymoney.blogspot.com/2010_06_01_archive.html

Tuesday, June 29, 2010. Now with that out of the way, I'll try moving forward with the zeal, zest, immoral and hopefully, highly offensive content that is SCUZZYMONEY, just a whole lot more legible. Oh, one other thing. I was going through my unpublished posts and ran across this. As a small child, being of delusional mind, hieroglyphic bowel movements and the sanctimonious burden I carried, I moved across the sweeping expanse of self-involvement and sheer ineptitude. I was a lost soul. Links to this post.

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SCUZZYMONEY: September 2010

http://scuzzymoney.blogspot.com/2010_09_01_archive.html

Sunday, September 26, 2010. Stats don't lie.and how to stay warm in Russia. (Excuse me Miss, are those real? I was checking out Blogger stats this morning, which would be a first. Really. I have never been to this part of the island, and in truth, before this morning I did not know that Blogger kept track of stats. I know that, just today, I've had 11 views from Russia alone. And I found out my blog post 'Excuse me Miss, are those new? Is my all time, most checked out post. Ever. And decide for yourselves.

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SCUZZYMONEY: Playing car games, and other ways to end up in the hospital.

http://scuzzymoney.blogspot.com/2010/10/playing-car-games-and-other-ways-to-end.html

Tuesday, October 19, 2010. Playing car games, and other ways to end up in the hospital. Anyway, 'slug bug' is both timeless and universal, right? So, after a nice dinner and a couple drinks we jumped in my vehicle, wrapping up the date, me taking her home. My plan, being the gentleman that I am,. Figured I'd throw myself at her in complete desperation,. And then punched her in the leg. DISREGARD LEG HAIR.TO BE FAIR, SHE WAS LAID UP AWHILE! We call it 'porno plates'. Here, you give it a try. Don't know ab...

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AAA1 Quality Blog, Ltd.: February 2011

http://tattytiara.blogspot.com/2011_02_01_archive.html

Monday, February 28, 2011. Roses are red, violets are blue. Obvious titles are lame, but this will just have to do. Dogs Should Not be Allowed to Write Greeting Cards. If I could express. How much I care. How much I love you. And how much you mean to me. If I could put it all into words. And say it to you. Would you let me have the last cheese puff? By your hand on my bum. Because I know you can't rip my intestines out with those blunt, square little monkey teeth. If you love something. You can trust tha...

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AAA1 Quality Blog, Ltd.: I view my titles as a means of expressing my love for you, (insert reader's name here).

http://tattytiara.blogspot.com/2012/03/i-view-my-titles-as-means-of-expressing.html

Sunday, March 25, 2012. I view my titles as a means of expressing my love for you, (insert reader's name here). May all the bugs in your food turn out to be poppy seeds. May you always pick the fastest cashier. May your analogies always make sense and your anecdotes never ramble. May your dog always make it to the yard in time. May your cell phone miss the toilet bowl completely, and land in the laundry hamper. May you manage to suck that thing out from between your teeth before it's your turn to talk.

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Out of the Mouse Nest...or Fifty Ways to Serve Shredded Wheat

Out of the Mouse Nest.or Fifty Ways to Serve Shredded Wheat. Rambles from the road, field, and nest. Tuesday, March 4, 2014. Eagle River, Alaska: One and a Half Years Ago. Links to this post. Trumpeter vs. Tundra Swans at Canandaigua City Pier, Canandaigua, New York. I made a stop down to the City Pier in Canandaigua this afternoon to try and catch up with some previously reported trumpeter swans. Tundras on the other side of the opening in the ice beginning to stir as well. Tundras 2 and 3. As seen from...

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Out of the Mouth of Babes

Out of the Mouth of Babes. This is a blog written by a first grade teacher. I am sharing funny stories and insights given by my students and other children I am privileged to work with. I am sharing talk from "out of the mouth of babes.". Friday, May 28, 2010. I was like, "What? What does that mean? Is that a good thing? Well, she told me it was a good thing. So, I'm fly! I thought that was cute and funny that her teacher is 'fly'. So, I (the 'fly' teacher- ha! Links to this post. Saturday, April 24, 2010.

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Out of the Mouth of Brittany

Out of the Mouth of Brittany. Wednesday, August 17, 2011. Remember when you couldn't wait to grow up and become something? Ok, I will admit it! Monday, Tuesday, then dreading the rest of the week until Friday at 3:30! Enjoying 2 days and then WHAT? I have to do it all over again for the next 40 years of my life? Where do they teach you about this Horrid lie called life? Remember the good 'ol days? Yes, I know I sounded old just then, but seriously! I miss being a kid! Not having a care in the world!

outofthemouthofdave.com outofthemouthofdave.com

Out of the mouth of Dave

October 13, 2014. Well I'm sure it's no surprise to anyone who follows the news that ISIS runs a pretty tight ship when it comes "morality". Roaming bands of "authorities" patrol the streets administering lashings and a good old fashioned tongue wagging when they see a female in the street who had the misfortune to expose her elbow. For more info on this go here:. Woman in Syria With Undercover Camera Exposes Life Under ISIS in Syria. ISIS Hardcore XXX Porn. ISIS - Hard Core Porn. September 23, 2014.

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Out of the Mouth of the Prophet | And when this cometh to pass, (lo it will come) then shall they know that a prophet hath been among them. Ezekiel 33:33

Out of the Mouth of the Prophet. And when this cometh to pass, (lo it will come) then shall they know that a prophet hath been among them. Ezekiel 33:33. Jellyfish Invasion Spoken Days Prior to Initial Report. Dr Branden A. Price. 1,600-plus Florida beachgoers stung by jellyfish, county officials say – CNN. This is to show people that God is speaking to men and women of God alike still today. But this man of God is able to see on a level that is unparalleled to anyone within our day and age. The ...If yo...

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Out of the Mouths of Angels

Out of the Mouths of Angels. Tuesday, 13 July 2010. I haven't posted here for ages. I'm really sorry. I haven't abandoned this space not at all. I just don't feel I have enough time to blog regularly, although I'm trying to get better. No one ever reads this anyway , so heaven knows why I'm apologising. I have a Tumblr now so that that's useful. Lots of pics and videos of things that appeal to me. I think it gives you a better impression of the things that interest me. Friday, 1 January 2010. I don't kno...

outofthemouthsofbabes-heather.blogspot.com outofthemouthsofbabes-heather.blogspot.com

Out of the Mouths of Babes

Out of the Mouths of Babes. Sunday, June 12, 2011. The End of an Era. It's official. Tomorrow marks the last day of kindergarten this family will ever have. No more fun after school lunch dates before the others get home, no more playing at the park just the two of us, no more mommy/child playdates for just Carson and me. How did it happen so fast? You always hear everyone say it will, but it never really sinks in until it actually happens to you! See me beautiful,. Look for the best in me. Landon asked ...

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'Out of the Mouths of Babes' YES! Moments

Out of the Mouths of Babes' YES! This blog is about tapping into the wisdom of the children around and within us all. I've felt blessed beyond words to have had the opportunity to learn much by traveling the globe, leading teams, building a business.but never, have I ever learned so much as I do daily from my children. I hope you read and feel empowered to see, to experience, to share more, but most of all I hope you add your 'Out of the Mouths of Babes' YES! Saturday, 12 May 2012. I have my own ideas bu...