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The Muk Report: June 2005
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When I think about my blog, I touch myself. Wednesday, June 29, 2005. Tom Cruise vs. American Psychiatric Association. A while ago I posted. About high school drop-out/actor Tom Cruise's recent Scientology-based ramblings. Well, it looks like the dipshit train isn't slowing any time soon. Tom Cruise: I know that psychiatry is a pseudo science. American Psychiatric Association: Medications can be an important and even life-saving part of a comprehensive and individualized treatment plan. As in other a...
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The Muk Report: November 2005
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When I think about my blog, I touch myself. Tuesday, November 22, 2005. It's a short week, what with all the turkey and traveling about to happen. I have a few new reports coming up that will most likely not get posted until next week. Until then, enjoy the holiday and give thanks that more people don't hate you. Seriously, eat well and start relaxing already. Posted by Muk @ 7:16 PM. Friday, November 18, 2005. Iranian Teens Going Blind. We'd be looking at a worldwide Kleenex shortage. It's safe to say t...
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The Muk Report: September 2005
http://themukreport.blogspot.com/2005_09_01_archive.html
When I think about my blog, I touch myself. Thursday, September 29, 2005. Fun with Yahoo People Search. Because I am a total retard, I actually wondered how many people there were out there named "Phyllis Stein." You know, because it's a homophone for "philistine.". So I powered up the ol' VIC-20 and navigated my way down the Infobahn (buckle up! Over to trusty Yahoo! And here's what I found,. Only 18 in the whole of the U.S! Posted by Muk @ 12:24 PM. Wednesday, September 28, 2005. Michael Brown: "I don'...
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The Muk Report: December 2005
http://themukreport.blogspot.com/2005_12_01_archive.html
When I think about my blog, I touch myself. Thursday, December 29, 2005. Guess the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest Winner (#31). Marginally clever, but largely toothless. Describes the bulk of the finalists and nearly all of the winners of the The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest. I originally planned to do something along the lines of Daniel Radosh's Anti-Caption Contest. To bring this to light, but was, alas, beaten to the punch. A similarly poignant send-up can be found in this McSweeney's List.
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The Muk Report: August 2005
http://themukreport.blogspot.com/2005_08_01_archive.html
When I think about my blog, I touch myself. Wednesday, August 31, 2005. He Giveth and Taketh Away. God: "Here's the deal. I will devastate an entire region, killing thousands and displacing hundreds of thousands more. Humanity: "Umm, ok.". God: "And in return.". God: One dude gets a boat. Humanity: [Places rifle to head]. Chalmette man quote from WWL-TV Blog. Posted by Muk @ 2:08 PM. Wow, just as I was posting this. Changed the 4th bullet to something more, well, appropriate. Posted by Muk @ 8:48 AM.
themukreport.blogspot.com
The Muk Report: April 2005
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When I think about my blog, I touch myself. Friday, April 29, 2005. A few people have lamented not being able to comment here on The Muk Report without signing in to Blogger first. I changed that setting, so you should be able to comment anonymously now. Posted by Muk @ 6:10 AM. Thursday, April 28, 2005. Kill Whitey in a Feckless, Ironic Way. Well, it looks like I am too late to catch this event in Williamsburg tonight. From Todd P's. TONITE - Thursday, April 28th @ CLUB EXIT TICKETS STILL AVAILABLE!
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The Muk Report: July 2005
http://themukreport.blogspot.com/2005_07_01_archive.html
When I think about my blog, I touch myself. Friday, July 29, 2005. I really don't like drinking games. The idea of playing a game in order to drink booze seems to really get in the way of, umm, actually drinking the booze. The worst are card games. First of all, it's never a game I know. Secondly, who can memorize these arcane rules, loaded at 1am? Not me. Drinking games suck. But there is one exception: quarters. Today, however, I am humbled. I just watched the fucking Tiger Woods of quarters. Of course...
themukreport.blogspot.com
The Muk Report: October 2005
http://themukreport.blogspot.com/2005_10_01_archive.html
When I think about my blog, I touch myself. Thursday, October 27, 2005. Filling the Supreme Court Void. Harriet Miers officially withdrew her nomination. To the Supreme Court. And so we begin the search for a new candidate. I'll just say it - what about Alice Cooper? Now, this isn't a cheap continuation of the running sight gag that Miers and Cooper were separated at birth. There's (slightly) more to it. Republican points: born again Christian, recovering boozer, supported Dubya, golfer. Like any other c...
