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Healing Shame: 287 - Shame is normal
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Tuesday, November 3, 2009. 287 - Shame is normal. We have been conditioned to feel ashamed of our shame and using the word can have a normalizing effect. It is important to make friends with our feelings of shame. I mean this in the sense that we need to feel our feelings in order to heal them. It is much easier to feel our feelings when they are met with understanding, acceptance and compassion, first from others then ourselves. Http:/ www.kenlewiscounselor.net. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). It th...
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Healing Shame: November 2009
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Wednesday, November 18, 2009. Sunday, November 15, 2009. 295 - A coping and healing tool. We can take away some of the power of shame over our lives and our relationships simply by learning how to identify and name it. Sharing it with someone who is safe for you can help also. Thursday, November 12, 2009. Wednesday, November 11, 2009. 293 - Support system. 291 - When you feel shame you have likely assumed it was about you and that there was something wrong with you. Most of the shame we have internal...
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Healing Shame: September 2009
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Wednesday, September 30, 2009. 265 - A form of self-support. One way to support ourselves when we are feeling shame is to remember what support felt like in our bodies in the past when we have felt supported by someone's understanding, acceptance and compassion and replicate that feeling now. Http:/ www.kenlewiscounselor.net/. Tuesday, September 29, 2009. Monday, September 21, 2009. Sunday, September 20, 2009. 263 - Challenging shaming thoughts. Thursday, September 17, 2009. Meditation can be useful in h...
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Healing Shame: August 2009
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Monday, August 31, 2009. 250 - Shame-bound need to nurture others. As children we sometimes wanted to nurture someone else, parent, etc. If these attempts to nurture were repeatedly met with rejection, ridicule, and shame the need to nurture would in time become bound up in shame and as adults we would have great difficulty nurturing others because shame would be a barrier to doing so. In this case even to feel the desire to nurture another person would trigger shame for us. Sunday, August 30, 2009.
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Healing Shame: 289 - Daily reading on shame
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Thursday, November 5, 2009. 289 - Daily reading on shame. Five minutes of shame reading per day from the recommended book list on shame which can be found on my website is a great help in understanding and accepting shame and speeds up the healing process immeasurably. In a sense this reading provides a new "pair of glasses" with which to see the ubiquity of shame as it is woven throughout our lives. Http:/ www.kenlewiscounselor.net. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). Instructions for leaving comments.
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Healing Shame: October 2009
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Thursday, October 29, 2009. Journaling can be useful in the process of healing shame by externalizing feelings. Journaling can also help us clarify, process and let go of these new or old shame feelings. Http:/ www.kenlewiscounselor.net. Wednesday, October 28, 2009. 284 - Need to feel felt. Http:/ www.kenlewiscounselor.net. Tuesday, October 27, 2009. 283 - Shame attacks can feel like a storm. Http:/ www.kenlewiscounselor.net. Monday, October 26, 2009. 282 - Shaming thoughts are interferences. It is usefu...
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Healing Shame: 286 - What is underneath the anger?
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Monday, November 2, 2009. 286 - What is underneath the anger? When we believe that the "problems" we have with another person are their fault, what we are doing is avoiding feeling our own shame/hurt by transferring the shame to the other by blaming them. No blame. The solution seems to be to allow ourselves to feel the shame/hurt under the anger. Blame destroys relationships and self-esteem. Http:/ www.kenlewiscounselor.net. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). Instructions for leaving comments. It then ...
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Healing Shame: July 2009
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Thursday, July 30, 2009. 229 - The ubiquity of shame. The unconscious triggering of shame that goes on between all of us happens on an intra-personal, interpersonal, inter-family, inter-cultural, inter-racial and even on an international level and of course leads to conflicts of all kinds on every level. Wednesday, July 29, 2009. 228 - Inner child work. Tuesday, July 28, 2009. 227 - Another form of "up and out". Monday, July 27, 2009. 226 - "up and out". In general it is useful to think of what needs to ...
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Healing Shame: 288 - Compassion
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Wednesday, November 4, 2009. My favorite definition of compassion is "to suffer with". We have all needed compassion from our important others and also needed to have compassion for others as well as ourselves. We need each other in order to heal shame. No blame. Http:/ www.kenlewiscounselor.net. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). Instructions for leaving comments. I welcome and appreciate any comments you may have regarding the Shame to Self-Acceptance posts. Option One - Easiest. Note: This process is...
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Healing Shame: 290 - When feeling stuck
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Sunday, November 8, 2009. 290 - When feeling stuck. When you are feeling "stuck" or "uncomfortable" look inside and you will likely notice some unacknowledged shame. The stuckness will move and change if you can share the shame with a safe person. Http:/ www.kenlewiscounselor.net. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). Instructions for leaving comments. I welcome and appreciate any comments you may have regarding the Shame to Self-Acceptance posts. Option One - Easiest. Note: This process is free and takes ...